My Life Without (gasp!) . . . Television

The story of how our family lost its TV was quite ominous and mysterious to my little mind. It had happened before I was born, and we'd never had a TV since. Evidently, the amount of time spent in front of the 'tube' was concerning to my mom, and she began to pray that it might be, uh, removed from our household. Soon thereafter, our TV began to smoke. Literally. In my little mind, I could picture black smoke rising up out of the TV. (Since then, I've always tried to stay on my mom's good side . . . !) They took it to the repair shop, but never got it back. To my young mind, the evidence was clear: God had acted, and TV was bad.

I still remember the day when we finally got a TV. We had gone the first 16 years of my life without one, and I was firmly embedded in the belief that I was better for it. I did all sorts of other things. As a young guy, afternoons found me with a few buddies, out in the back pasture, pretending to be Daniel Boone and Davy Crocket, complete with fake long guns. As I got older, real hunting replaced fake hunting. Sports were a big part of life. I also learned how to lose myself in a good book—a habit I still have to this day. Most of all, I used my imagination, and that provided plenty of entertainment. But one day, we got a TV and a VCR. I think I remember it so clearly because it seemed so . . . strange.

I adjusted quickly, however. Soon, I was finishing each day with Sports Center, or whatever else was on ESPN. We started renting movies and watching shows and everything that 'normal' families do. We were pretty tame in our choices, but I do remember that a family division started to arise. Maybe your family has it also. As kids, there were movies that we all watched, and movies that "Mom and Dad probably wouldn't like." Funny thing was, we weren't really watching anything too risqué. But with Mom and Dad being part of the older generation and everything, they were just a bit more sensitive in their consciences than we were. We didn't want to watch anything with them that might, you know, offend them or something. Sometimes the realities of life can be a little shocking to those who aren't young and relevant, and we wouldn't have wanted to spoil their naiveté . . .

You know those moments in life when you realize up is down and down is up? I sure was surprised when I found out that Mom and Dad avoided certain movies to protect us, not themselves! What a novel idea! Here I was, sure that they would have been shocked by all of the 'mature' issues these films were dealing with, and they were avoiding them to protect me! Hmm . . .

Soon I left for college, and encountered a strange phenomenon: Guys would stay up all night to shoot aliens and zombies on a TV screen, when there was a real world right outside the men's dorm. Some of these same guys (who I deeply love to this day) struggled intensely with internet pornography, but insisted on the need to watch most of the latest movies so that they could stay 'relevant.' Might there be a connection? Many of them finally lived out Jesus' words to 'cut it off' and decided to be more careful with what filled their minds. I wonder if sometimes our ability to distinguish between reality and fantasy starts to become handicapped . . .

I remember sitting around with a group of guys one night and quoting nearly every line from a popular movie . . . and afterwards wondering how our world would be different if Christians knew their Bibles that well . . .

I've been out of college for a few years now, and my love/hate relationship with media continues. Although I've never gotten in the habit of watching anything really rotten, I have watched some of the mainstream shows. I've started to question the imprint that media makes on my heart. And I've started to be much more careful about what I watch and listen to, because I wonder if our hearts aren't nearly as tough as we think they are. I wonder if we are far more susceptible to the imprinting of the world than we think. I suspect that we are far more influenced by the world of make believe than we admit. I think our hearts are sensitive—and we should guard them. I wonder—what things 'imprint' our hearts, and where do they come from?

Is lust really just a lost battle for every man—or do the seemingly safe movies we watch stir us more than we think? Is greed something that all Americans struggle with—or do the advertisements we sit through impact us more than we admit? Do all people struggle with comparing themselves to others—or is this a result of watching abnormal people live out unrealistic lives on television? Gossip? Swearing? Ungodly ambition? The list goes on . . .

I haven't gotten rid of my TV just yet, (nor have I canceled my subscription to Netflix), but I'm choosing to be much more careful about what I watch and listen to these days. Jesus often links the eyes and the heart (Mt 6:22). Paul tells us to guard what we think about (Phil. 4:8). And in Ephesians 5:3, Paul says, "But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's holy people." The old standby question still works—would I feel comfortable watching that show with Jesus as my viewing partner? I don't think Jesus is 'out-of-touch' or 'extra-sensitive'—but He is HOLY . . . and I'm called to be also. Not so that I can impress anyone. Not so I can miss out on the rest of life. Not even to 'follow the rules.' No, it's to guard my heart. Because my heart isn't as tough as I used to think it is. Maybe the older generation isn't so naive after all! Does your TV need to start smoking?!!

Try Hate for a Change . . .

There it is again. It just won’t go away. Every time you turn around, it’s there. Lurking. Leering. Inviting. As soon as you get rid of it, it just reincarnates. The more you try not to think about it, the stronger it pulls you. It’s timing is always terrible, and it ambushes you when you least expect it. You know what I’m talking about . . .


War is hard enough when the enemy is another country. It’s hard enough when you’re fighting against another person. It’s more difficult still when it’s against an invisible enemy (Ephesians 6:12). But war against yourself? That’s something different altogether.

“For in my inner being I delight in God's law; but I see another law at work in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within my members.” (Romans 7:22-23)

You know the war Paul’s talking about. When we come to Jesus, our ‘inner being’ is changed to ‘delight in God’s law’, but our body—our flesh—is still ‘programmed’ to sin. We’ve practiced sin for so long that it is simply part of our natural response. Maybe it’s deep seeded arrogance. Maybe it’s out-of-control insecurity. It could be gossip, lust, anger, bitterness, dishonesty . . . . We all know the list. And we all know our list. And according to Paul, it’s a war.

Notice that Paul didn’t say two things. He didn’t say that we’re all just ‘forgiven sinners’ who will never achieve any form of godliness this side of heaven. That’s just giving up on the war, and Paul isn’t recommending that. He also didn’t say that the war is already won—that we’re already perfect if we just have enough faith. Yes, ours sins are completely forgiven. Yes, “we have all we need for life and godliness.” But, he said that we’re at war . . . against ourselves.

In sports, we’re told that ‘the best offense is a good defense.’ I don’t know if it is really true, or if coaches just struggle to get kids excited about defense. But in the war against sin and Satan, it’s false. Sure, we’ve got to guard the home front, but when it comes to sin, a good defense doesn’t get us too far. We’ve all failed at the “don’t think about a pink elephant” trick, and yet we try to engage the same strategy with sin. Don’t think about how much you hate that person . . . Don’t think about that girl . . . Quit being so #@!& angry! . . . It’s a losing battle, isn’t it? The more I try not to sin, the more I think about it.

In Luke 6, Jesus says “But I tell you who hear me: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.” The command itself is worth noting, but did you catch the strategy? He says, “Give up on trying to ‘not hate’ your enemies. Turn it over. Love them.” I wonder if that same strategy applies to other areas of sin. Give up on trying to ‘not gossip’—spend your energy finding something uplifting to say. Give up on trying to ‘not be angry’—find a way to express genuine kindness. Give up on trying to ‘not be proud’—find a way to serve someone. Give up on trying to ‘not be greedy’—give your money away. Give up on trying not to sin—love! The war within us is a war of competing loves. Merely subduing our bad loves doesn’t work (love of self, love of power, love of wisdom, love of riches). We must replace those loves with proper love—play offense!

Jesus makes it very clear that love and hate work together (Matthew 6:24). In our pluralistic culture, we don’t like such talk as “You must love the one and hate the other.” But that’s how the war goes. We can’t ‘dislike’ sin and love God. It doesn’t work to ‘want to get rid of’ sin and love God. Our affections for God demand a hatred of sin. For the past couple of years, I’ve slowly gotten in the habit of asking God to help me hate my habitual sin. It’s an amazingly effective prayer! And, I’ve been intrigued by how God causes me to hate my sin. He always draws me to see the relational consequences of my sin—in other words, how my sin is hurting those I love. Am I struggling with pride? He’ll show me where my arrogance crippled vital friendships. Am I struggling with anger? He’ll show me episodes in recent weeks where my hard-hearted silence shredded close friends. Am I struggling with my words? He’ll show me how my simmering irritation is wounding those whom I count dear. Don't you hate it when you realize that you have caused a major reaction by some stupid thing you've said or done? You want to turn back the clock, vow you'll remember not to do that again—especially in marriage when you used to having the sweetness of oneness and you've wrecked it for a day or two. Aaahhh, so painful! It’s amazing how quickly I hate sin when I see the immediate relational consequences!

The war goes on. Relief won’t come until heaven. In the meantime, we must remember that sin is a relational problem, and a love problem, which demands relational and love solutions. Guard your heart (Prov 4:23). Wash it in the Bible (Eph 5:26). Let it be made holy by the Word (John 17:17). Hate sin. And love!

Did you succeed today?

What do you think about at the end of the day? When your head hits the pillow, do you ponder successes made? Do you contemplate opportunities lost? Did I think well today? Were my strategies good? Did I properly discern the problems of the day? Or, Did I accomplish my goals for the day? Did I make good progress on my to-do list? The more ‘spiritual’ among us might ask, Did I speak about Jesus today? Did I live with great faith? Or, Did I serve with passion? Did I sacrifice for others? Do you see how the questions we ask ourselves today direct our actions tomorrow? How do you evaluate yourself?


What measurements do you use to decide whether you have succeeded or failed? When you look back on a moment, week, season, or year, what determines your sense of victory or defeat? When you find yourself sighing in discouragement, or celebrating a job well done, what makes the difference? How do you evaluate yourself?

I wonder if this is what Paul is driving at in 1 Corinthians 13. You know how it goes:
“If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.”

Before you gloss over this passage because of its familiarity, take a second look. Can you imagine what it would be like to “speak in the tongues of men and angels”? Wouldn’t it be fantastic to “fathom ALL mysteries and ALL knowledge”? We’d all like to have “faith that can move mountains”. And surely no one can criticize the person who gives all they have to the poor and then gives their life for the gospel!

Paul does. He criticizes it—if it’s done without love. In fact, he says that it is all going to go away (v.8). He says that our knowledge and wisdom can’t be trusted (v.9). He says only love will last (v.13). And it’s interesting to note that Paul believes that these great things can be done without love. In other words, great actions are not always good indicators of a loving heart. Scary.

To be clear, I’m a huge fan of right talking, good thinking, sacrificial serving, etc. I’m not ready to give up on any of those things. Don’t worry—I’m not jumping off the post-modern cliff of total relativism! It’s just that these things are all fallen. Just as my heart and body were damaged with sin in Genesis 3, so was my mind. So are my actions. But if “God is love” (1 John 4:8), and God’s Spirit lives in us (Rom. 5:5), then the truest expression of God in our lives is love. Love defined His way.

Love gets a bad rap in our Christian circles. Perhaps we’ve been too inundated by Hollywood versions of love. Perhaps we’re rightly suspicious of the consistent Disney message to ‘just follow your heart’. Perhaps love feels to ‘soft and cuddly’ to be trusted. So we’ve swung the pendulum and gotten rid of love altogether. (For an excellent blog post on this, see Peter Mead’s Valentine’s Day blog at http://www.cordeo.org.uk/fluffy-love). We’ve decided that we can’t trust the fluffy feelings of love, and we’ve emphasized the more measurable aspects of our faith, like right thinking and good actions. The problem is, in 1 Corinthians 13 Paul declares those to be of secondary importance. He declares love to be on top.

To be clear, we’re not free to define love in whatever terms we desire. The Bible doesn’t describe Hollywood love as the answer. Equally important, it doesn’t simplistically reduce love to a ‘decision’ of the mind and will. If you doubt that, read Hosea! Rather, love is truly an affection of the heart. We respond to God’s love with our love—a whole body, compelling, life-changing love. It means we really get to love God and love people, in a way that captures all of us—heart, soul, mind, and strength (to quote Jesus). All of Scripture displays what that love looks like.

So, when my head hits the pillow, I want to ask, Did I love today? I know my life will move in the direction of the questions I ask myself. Did I love today? Did I love my wife with my attitudes and internal conversations? Did I love my son and make time to spend with him? Did I love my co-workers, my classmates? Did I spend my money lovingly? Was my day orientated around the things that matter? Why did I do what I did? Did I love today?

How about you? How do you know if you loved today? How do you evaluate yourself?

Love Letters, Part 2

I’m skipping my Bible reading to write this blog post.  Kind of ironic, isn’t it?  Well, I’m not skipping it in its entirety—I read a couple chapters this morning.  But, I just wasn’t fully ‘into’ it.  My mind was on other things, and my heart couldn’t seem to engage the Scriptures.  What to do?

It’s funny how controversial Bible reading is.  Some people claim it as one of the essential ‘spiritual disciplines’.  Others largely dismiss it as ‘just one of many ways to get to know God’, which carries the implication that it isn’t one of ‘my’ ways to get to know God.  Some treat it as a necessary evil, as evidenced by their need of ‘accountability’ to get it done.  Still others claim, “I’m just not a reader”, and move on to other things.

I wonder if we have a focus problem.

I wonder if we expect the wrong things.

It seems like wrong expectations of the Bible can have cataclysmic results.  Like, missing the heart of God.  Or, missing our Savior.  At least, that’s what Jesus says in John 5:39-40: “You search the Scriptures because you think that in them you have eternal life; it is these that testify about Me; and you are unwilling to come to Me so that you may have life.”  Did you catch that?  Many in this audience would have had Genesis through Deuteronomy memorized.  Some would have labored to be able to recite the entire Old Testament.  And yet somehow, amidst all of that, they had missed the main character, because they expected the wrong things.  When you read the Bible, what do you expect?

Might it be that we find what we look for?  Do we ‘mine for gold’—looking for tidbits and tokens?  Maybe we search for data—looking for interesting facts and doctrinal proof texts.  Or, we might anticipate being proven right—looking for those verses that reinforce our preconceived ideas . . . .  When you read the Bible, what do you expect?

Or, better said, When you read the Bible, who do you expect?

Did you notice the solution Jesus offered?  “It is these that testify about Me.”  Dr. John Mitchell used to say, “When you read the Bible, look for Jesus.”  It’s almost as if we’re supposed to read the Bible like it’s transparent, like it’s a set of fantastic optics made to bring the living God into focus—up close and personal.  It’s almost as if we’re supposed to read the Bible for the sake of the author, not just the sake of the information in the text.  It’s almost as if we’re supposed to read the Bible to gain the heart of God, not just the right application.  It’s almost as if we’re supposed to meet the Living Word through the written Word.  Maybe . . .

Don’t get me wrong.  I’m all for studying God’s Word for meaning—I do that every time I teach.  I’m all for outlining books—I’m working on Titus right now.  And, I don’t expect to have an out-of-body experience every time I read the Bible.  Some mornings, I’m too distracted, or too tired, or too ‘whatever’ to read effectively.  I just can’t seem to expect the right thing—or the right person.  And I read anyway.  But when all is said and done, I want to be a person who knows my Savior well.  I want my heart to beat with His heart.  I want to laugh at what He laughs at, and cry at what makes Him cry.  I want to smile when He smiles, and sigh when He sighs.  I want to ‘hang out’ with my Savior, so that He ‘rubs off on me’, and I become like Him.  Not just in actions, but in affections and attitudes.  When you love someone, you spend time with him.  Him.

So, how does someone read the Bible relationally?  How does someone open the Word, expecting to meet the Living Word?  Here’s a few thoughts to get us started:

• Invite the Holy Spirit.  It is the Spirit who makes the Word of God “living and active.”  We need to invite Him to show us God’s heart in God’s Word.
• Try ‘just’ reading.  Sometimes we spend so much time ‘dissecting’ Scripture that we lose the heart.  Reading it aggressively keeps us moving, and allows God to ‘underline’ His heart on our heart.  It’s part of the “washing of water with the word” that Paul talks about.
• Read it conversationally.  Ask questions of God/Christ, debate, argue, disagree—respectfully of course . . .
• Read it personally.  Put yourself in the story, in the text, be one of the disciples, watch what Christ does, be Paul, "mediating" between Christ and the congregation . . .
• Set the stage for ‘a date’.  We don’t try to do good communication with people with the TV blaring while we try to pay the bills (or, at least, we shouldn’t!).  We have to make room for God in our day.  A bit of quietness and calmness helps the conversation.
• Recognize the privilege.  The living God has pursued us with a love letter.  God is a communicating God.  He’s a pursuing God.  We simply get to respond to His pursuit.  Wow!  Millions of God-followers who have gone before us call us ‘blessed’, because we get to have a Bible on our shelf.  It’s a privilege.
• Expect to meet with Jesus—and ask Him to meet with you.  Let’s open our hearts for surgery, expecting to be cleansed.  Let’s open our minds for renewal.  Let’s put our lives and character before the King, ready for transformation.  But most of all, let’s expect to meet with our Savior.  He loves us!  He loves to meet with us!  He yearns to share His heart with us!  What a privilege to be a friend of the Savior!

So, what do we do about our ‘Bible reading problems’ that we mentioned earlier?  I’m sure there is no magic bullet.  But, I will say this—some of the most captivated Bible readers that I know hate to pick up any other book.  They wouldn’t read a novel if someone paid them.  But they read their Bibles, and they experience the life change, because they expect to meet with Jesus—and they do!  It’s not a ‘spiritual discipline’—it’s a date with Jesus.  How about you?  When you read the Bible, who do you expect?

Better go finish my quiet time . . .